My life-long fascination with wetness which is predominantly a male thing, reached fresh depths of saturation levels with this letter in the New Zealand Herald.

Jewel disregarded
The old Government House lawn and surrounds have been a secluded jewel in central Auckland for many decades. It has been lovingly cared for and has prominent signs forbidding ball games, presumably to protect both the lawn and the opportunity for quiet reflection and enjoyment.

Regrettably, the supposed guardians of this historical treasure, Auckland University, have once again erected a temporary pavilion covering the full lawn. When it is removed, the lawn will again have been damaged and downgraded. Hopefully they don’t have plans for more permanent use of the area, but maybe they do and are easing their way in.

Whatever, it is very disappointing that the university is showing such callous disregard for this precious historical, cultural and environmental asset that many Auckland citizens treasure.

Ken Allen, Auckland Central.


It’s a bloody lawn mate and most certainly not a “secluded jewel in central Auckland” nor a “precious historical, cultural environmental asset that many Auckland citizens treasure”.

There are lawns everywhere; in schools, rugby fields, golf greens and so on, all being trampled on non-stop. Further, no matter how chopped up by a temporary structure, probably no other plant has the quick recovery powers of grass.

TVNZ should be in here pronto and offer Ken a half hour weekly show to comment on all and sundry. It would be gripping viewing for all students of wetness.


When I saw the headline I thought it was going to be an article on male bladder leakage.

Rory Fitzgerald May 7, 2019 at 7:36 pm

I Love it, I love it……….You know why ?
He sounds like a Kiwi should be. Not these cry babies on the most dreadful 7 pm slot in TV history “The Project” .and the tearful strutting TVNZ presenters, one emotion at a time.
Strange as it may seem what we need now in New Zealand are Ken Kiwis.
Better still drop the Kiwi handle , we need New Zealanders, male and female.
I am not one. However my father used to always say to me , “Bob Charles is the most wonderful New Zealander “……………I never forgot that and even then i knew little of the place.
He was right and I emigrated to New Zealand.
Wonderful people and the Ken incident brings it all back.

What can I say.

Stopped reading the Horrid when the paywall went up.

Not going to pay for cut and paste churnalism.

Ken might like to consider the fact that at 9.00 every morning the staff at the Waitangi Treaty House put out a set of children’s cricket stumps, bat, and ball…slap in the middle of the lawn between the Treaty House and the Flagpole. This is the literal birthplace of our nation and is by any measure the most important lawn in the country…and in a commendable display of common sense they encourage young and old to run about all over it. I’m sure a patch of grass in Auckland can manage to survive without some busybody protecting its virtue.

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