A friend sent me the following piece on Trump.

Someone asked “Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?”

Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote the following response:

A few things spring to mind.  Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem.  For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed.

So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.
Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever.

I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman.

But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.  Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers.

And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.  There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface.

Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront.  Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul.  And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist.  Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that.  He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat.  He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.

And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully.  That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead.

There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless or female – and he kicks them when they are down.

So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:
• Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and most are.
• You don’t need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.

This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss.

After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.

God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid.  He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart.  In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump.


He lost me when he started fawning over Obama, the windbag in chief.

Trump is actually very funny.

    Yes, I always laugh every time I see him open his mouth. Always very funny. The funniest person in the history of America. Fact. Any other view is fake news. Many idiots are funny, particularly when they are being serious.

    As a political performer, he is an unprincipled entertainer and utterly dominates the media in consequence. As a political operative he is a bold contrarian, innovative and insightful.

    American politics is messy and Trump is the ultimate messy political operator. His electorate likes him because no-one owns him, least of all the elite that sneer at him – like this author.

      The American Electoral System is morally corrupt. A larger mess you couldn’t invent if you tried too but the fact remains the electors voted for Trump. Compare it to Britain. Having knifed Teresa, Boris was elected by his Tory mates not the electorate. A diatribe from some blown away Pom criticising Trump is like piddling into a fan it makes you smell of narcissism.

      markscreaminggoosearmstrong May 5, 2020 at 1:58 pm

      How can Trump be insightful when he contradicts so many things he’s said?
      Having said that, every time he’s in sight he looks pretty full. Of himself and last meal he ate.

      Insightful is what he does, not what he says. Words to Trump are just a tool for getting there.

      Alan , your bold contrarian is my “what the hell is he talking about ? ”
      Your innovative makes me think ” bleach anyone ? ”
      Your insightful is ” it’s always about me ”
      And no-one owns him because he can’t even control himself !

      Gwha, you realise the disinfectant being discussed when Trump made his throw away comment was an alcohol, not bleach?

      Probably not, because his media enemies like to pitch rocks not marshmallows.

    That’s because he has no respect for “political class”. Neither do I, so I laugh along with him!

Hard to disagree with that

Bob, all correct except one major point you have missed. Having travelled often & extensively in the US in recent times in my opinion there are two underlying themes for people supporting Trump. I: Heaps of them say they don’t like him much but for once they have a President who sticks to his promises & gets things done. 2: In 2016 just before the election they were saying ” I will vote for anyone except that woman”. My feeling is that the Americans are one group of people who have got past personality politics and want a doer.

Are you sure you didn’t pen this Bob?

I think that Nate has not done his research. There are various examples of Donald Trump’s wit and vision.
“Ariana Huffington is unattractive both inside and out. I fully understand why her former husband left her for a man–he made a good decision.”
“I’ve always said, ‘If you need Viagra, you’re probably with the wrong girl.’ ”
“If you’re interested in ‘balancing’ work and pleasure, stop trying to balance them. Instead make your work more pleasurable.”
and there are examples of his vision for the future of the USA
“We will no longer surrender this country or its people to the false song of globalism.”
and his succinct summary of Hillary Clinton
“Hillary Clinton has perfected the politics of personal profit and theft. She ran the State Department like her own personal hedge fund – doing favors for oppressive regimes, and many others, in exchange for cash.”
Nate makes the mistake of confusing politicians with celebrities. Donald Trump is first and foremost a CEO and he has been very effective at reversing the many mistakes and destructive policies of the previous administration. The USA and the world owe him a debt of gratitude for his efforts, not mindless criticism based on superficial, irrelevant trivialities.

Irrespective he was elected President and still is. Didn’t Boris knife Teresa May in the back. How many children has Boris fathered? The British elected a paragon of virtue as PM I don’t think. Criticise Tump but your man is just as big a twit.

    True, but Trump is a dangerous Twit who almost allowed that alcoholic Bolt to drag America into destroying North Korea, and from there an uncontrolled war in Asia.

      Rubbish. Trump called NK’s bluff and stared China down. They were neither stupid nor suicidal.

      Well it could’ve been much worse, he could’ve infected the whole world with a disease the kills 250,000 (so far), destroyed the global economy which resulted in a global depression, & lied about it so that nobody can do anything about it until it was too late, all the while buying up & requisitioning the world’s medical equipment necessary to combat the virus so he could sell it back to them with a nice profit. Oh wait, that was the Chinese wasn’t it – so who is the dangerous twit again?

This is a ripper, Bob.

This is a ripper, Bob.
Alan Duff

Yet the people who supported Trump never supported Trump. They supported what he said he would do – and Trump has done everything he can to try and do it.

In other words, the people who voted for Trump are far better judges of character than they appear.

Btw, I found myself throwing up at first sight with that Obama guy. I got pure slime off him straight off the mark. A fake, well manicured persona. A deeply immature man who behind it all only cares about his vanity. Was I right? I think so. Trump’s lack of prentence–for better and worse–has been such a breath of fresh air. Buffoon and all.

He lost the popular vote by 3.3 million. The total votes he won the election with – by winning three crucial states in rhe midwest – was 37,000. That’s right. 37,000. Thanks to the electoral college, that’s all it took. So please, let’s have less talk about his unique insights and revolutionary style. The guy is a bullshit artist from Queens, for godsake…

    The electoral college doesn’t work like that. Trump won by 304 electoral college votes to Hillary’s 227. Hillary’s “win” (2.9M votes) in the largely irrelevant popular vote was bolstered mostly by LA County which is why the electoral college was designed to give proportional representation to the states with smaller populations.

      Actually, that’s exactly how the electoral college works. It gives people in less populous states, like my own, Maine, as much as four times the voting power as those in more populous states (e.g., California and New York). We have the same problem with regards to the Senate. Every state has two senators – yet Maine’s population is 1.2 million, California’s is 40 million.

Let’s just have a look at the authors claims about Trump for a minute:

No class – Maybe.
No charm – Has had better results & shown more diplomatic charm with Jong Un and Xi than his predecessor.
No coolness – Shown incredible restraint during Russian collusion scam, impeachment scam, fake news slanders, spying on his campiagn, etc.
No credibility – Kept his promises, strong economy, strong military, strong employment, strengthening border, no wars, etc.
No compassion – Cares for US victims of illegal immigrants and drug cartels, veterans, US workers and industry.
No wit – Constantly takes the piss out of political opponents and the press.
No warmth – Shows more warmth to victims of illegal immigrants and drug cartels than those who support sanctuary cities.
No wisdom – Strong economic growth, strong military, better trade deals, stronger borders, better employment numbers, etc.
No subtlety – Subtlety is irrelevant, results are important.
No sensitivity – True, he’s thickskinned & not easily triggered, although he is sensitive to the needs of the US workers, citizens, and industry.
No self-awareness – Self aware enough to win the election. Hillary has no self awareness, & Obama was consumed by it (i.e. vanity).
No humility – Isn’t a career politician, does the job for free (i.e. donates presidential salary).
No honour – Kept his promises.
No grace – Hard to show grace with Russian collusion scam, impeachment scam, fake news slanders, spying on his campiagn, etc.

Obama on the other hand constantly lied (e.g. if you like your insurer … ), sacrificed his Benghazi embassy staff and falsely blamed it on a blogger, probably spied on Trump’s campaign, screwed people’s healthcare, had a lame economy, bad employment, bad trade deals, porous borders, allowed the rise of ISIS, allowed the Russian invasion of Ukraine, increased his wealth by 30 times during his term as president (i.e. corrupt), etc. Hillary is worse than Obama as well, so whether or not you like Trump the alternative was worse.

Brilliant piece.
Brilliant editing.
The last line in the original was witty but superfluous

markscreaminggoosearmstrong May 5, 2020 at 2:16 pm

Nice piece. Interesting the kind of positive comments about the sTrumpet; he seems to polarise views – a bit like our Sir Robert.
When the first came to (his ultimate) power I initially thought he needed to be shot, and likely would be, but within a month or two I realised even he is not stupid enough to do the power-hungry things he’d threatened to do. And he still hasn’t so maybe he’s a mostly harmless buffoon…but in my view, a little in keeping with Sir Robert’s post, his election is the most derogatory indication of the intelligence of far too many U.S. voters. Although without any knowledge of U.S. politics I guess his opposition one way and another helped him out.

    Funny you should say that Goose.
    When he first came to power I also thought he was likely to be assassinated.
    No one that demented could possibly go full term.
    Then it dawned on me , the only people likely to assassinate a president are those that are actually his supporters.

    Trump’s election was due to the utter revulsion millions of Americans felt toward the woman most qualified to be President and toward the sexual predator husband she protected.

Magoo, as usual, your racist hatred is showing. Quite how your comments relate to the topic I do not know, unless you mean that Trumps inaction has led to the high death toll from the virus on America of a many thousands.
And if you are trying to somehow compare America to China, better you look at the hundreds of thousands of dead from the America invasion of Iraq. America has little to be proud of this century.
I simply do not respect somehow hiding behind a label of ‘Magoo’.

Reading the comments here by far the majority don’t seem to get what you or your column is about.

markscreaminggoosearmstrong May 5, 2020 at 4:10 pm

Why DO most of us hide behind a pseudonym? Sir Bob has the courage of his convictions. Can’t understand why the anon dominates these pages.
Can one of you with presumably concealed motives explain please? I’m not asking you to break cover but I might be questioning both your courage and commitment to your stated views? Although a few out there are so full of anger, blind bias and probably ethanol, they may need to keep hidden…
But hey, nout wrong with a little ethanol methinks, as long as one is aware of it’s effects on ones judgement. Which noone is after over-imbibing but that’s half the fun.

I must read some more Nate White if I can find it.
The man is a genius.
Trump is the first person in history to have no redeeming qualities at all.

On the subject of English views, I spoke to a friend of mine in England about lockdown. He said that when lockdown was announced there, the old guys rushed to the pubs, to quaff one last pint. For the first time in this crisis, I felt a sense of hope.
Of course, more people may die of this nasty flu in Britain, as a result. The cost of freedom is always high, as JFK would say…
The British (and the yanks, for that matter) don’t give up their freedoms, without a whimper, like we do here.
On the subject of Trump, legacy is an interesting issue.
I remember from my University days a lecture about the economist Thomas Malthus. Basically, he was an Anglican cleric, and the lecturer said he was supposed to be a kind and caring man. He wanted to help people.
His theory, written just before 1800, was that population multiplies geometrically and food supply arithmetically. Whenever the food supply increases, population will rapidly grow to eliminate the excess. Famines, disease and wars were the inevitable consequence of his theory, to wipe out the excess population.
The first obvious point 220 odd years later is that his theory has proved incorrect to date. Population has increased massively, and the world has had food security for decades (this could change now).
However, his theory was believed at the time. When the Irish famine occurred, one of the reasons that no assistance was given to the Irish was that Malthusian economics showed this was pointless – they would inevitably die anyway. Alan Partridge proposed a second possible reason for the Irish famine – “at the end of the day, they will pay the price for being a fussy eater”.
Another person taken by Malthusian theory was Adolf Schicklgruber. His policy of Lebensraum (living space) was adopted to address Malthusian concerns. WW2 ensued.
The legacy of Mr Malthus was rather shockingly awful, despite his generally agreeable nature.
I would agree in entirety with the posting about Mr Trump. However, in terms of the legacy of Mr Trump, I suspect most people will simply remember him as an idiot, but he will be largely forgotten. The institutions of the USA are strong. The media is free to criticize him. One bad President will not wipe out the USA. It’s a stress test, that they will survive and flourish.
In terms of NZ, I’m not so confident. Our media is far more biased than the US media (I have had 60 Stuff postings deleted in a row). Our institutions are weak. Ms Ardern may arguably be a kind person (I’m not convinced), but irrespectively, this doesn’t mean that that disaster cannot ensue. Not since Sir Robert Muldoon has someone yielded such power in NZ.
I’d be more concerned with NZ’s future than the USA

Regardless of your view of Mr Trump, I think the level of discourse about him has reached an unpleasant level, and be honest-who amoungst us has a life or opinions that would stand up to the level of scrutiny he is under now? If Trump cured cancer tomorrow, the Press would report “Trump adds to overpopulation”

Media snap about 100 photos per briefing… if they like the guy they publish the smiley one, if they don’t, the mouth open one. don’t think you’re getting “news”, you are in fact getting “Views”!!

Very apt, the one thing that comes to my mind that casts this in to any doubt is this comment that caused the typical uproar.

    I say someone say recently that,Trump could go from winning and unwinnable election to losing and unloseable one.

    Poetic justice?

So refreshing to read such a candid, insightful expose. It’s not every day one gets the truth revealed about such a scoundrel and pompous blaggard. Pity he chose the President as his topic to reveal his failings – so common old chap!

The preamble on President Trump is a little over the top.While the British may admire the finer traits of the human character,they do not have a monopoly on them.Robin Hood and Oliver Twist are fictitious ,so perhaps not the best examples.Britian has produced some of histories Greats and many ruthless tyrannts and oppressors,but the article doesn’t acknowledge this.By writing such a vitriol filled article the author is guilty of many of the sins he accuses the President of.

I think President Trump is misread by many. A lot of what he says is tongue in cheek and he’s funny. He trolls all the time. I don’t think he has much in the way of finesse but I think he has had definite views about the way the US has been going since he was a young man. His views haven’t changed and he is actually implementing things that he stated many years ago. From what I have read over the past few years he is actually well liked by the ordinary guy in the street and I am sure he will be reelected in November. Personally, I can’t understand why he would even want to stand again after the anti-Trump propaganda waged by the media over the past three plus years. Sir Rob won’t like it when I say that he himself is not unlike Trump, in that he doesn’t suffer fools and nor does Trump. I think history will judge President Trump as a clever man for the times. To put things into perspective: Nate White is an articulate witty writer from England. Donald Trump is the President of the United States of America and even Nate White has been lured into commenting about him. There is a lot more to Donald Trump than the media would have you believe.

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