Last Saturday at midday, a 4 metre tree fell over in central Wellington’s Midland Park, on to the pavement.

As gardeners know this is a common Spring event for deciduous trees, as in this case, which have not budded and are plainly dead.

I have 50 acres of gardens and each Spring this occurs several times, occasionally over my winding near mile long drive.

My gardeners grab the chainsaw, cut off the limbs (in the Wellington case about five), pull them to the edge and saw them into small lengths. All in, at most a five minute exercise.

Midland Park marks the widest part of Lambton Quay.

So how did the “authorities” cope with this “crisis”?

First, God only knows why, the Police were called. Then the Fire Brigade and city emergency services turned up, according to the Dominion-Post, to “provide scene protection” whatever that means.

And finally after an hour, a contractor was called to carry out the 5 minute cutting up exercise.

All in this carry-on was a world-class display of wetness in coping with a trivial, easily fixed matter.

Also, I reluctantly must concede, it’s vintage Wellington imbued as it is in bureaucratic nonsense.


And where are the counsellors to succour the traumatised and the “Be Kind” signs?
The team of 5 million awaits while wringing its hands clutching its pearl and holding onto the man Buns further ‘explosive’ and ‘shocking developments.’
The Babylon Bee in the US notes that the tree fell down because of Trump’s known uncivil Arborism.

The generous ratepayers will pick up the tab. Cheers, Andy.

I’m alarmed that there is no report of the kilometre long road cone deployment essential for such a hazardous operation.

Bob, don’t get me started. How about the contractual cutting of grass on the side of the road. First we are greeted with a sign to say that verge mowing is in progress, then there is the obligatory 10 ton truck with flashing signs to warn us with the driver waving a red flag out the window. Finally the mower itself, and then a vehicle with a sign saying “hank you”. What happened to the simple sign of “Mower next 5km”? Three people to oversee a man mowing the grass verge. Just ludicrous!!

    Three? On a good dasy. Usually the ten tonne truck requires a driver and a “spotter” and often the front vehicle requires two as well which is why we look at approx $900 per mowing hour. Thanks “Health & Safety”……….

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