The constant silly use of the word “Window” to convey a limited time period reached its peak absurdity last week in The Guardian. This was in an article about a missing woman which has gripped the British media, primarily with attacks on the police because of their unnecessary revelations about the woman’s personal troubles. It even drew the Prime Minister’s comments.

Her body has now been found, exactly where the police always claimed it would be, namely in the Wyne river they always believing she had fallen into while walking her dog.

Reporting on this The Guardian wrote,  ”…detectives believe there was only a 10 minute window when she was out of sight”.

If it was a bloody window then the last thing she was was out of sight, moreso given the police had produced an actual window, if they must use this silly term, tracing all of the woman’s movements leading up to her disappearance.

Good speech is ALWAYS plain speech and the habit of silly terminology is a regrettable modern development tracing back to the early 1970s.

Then the word “fundamental” came into vogue in New Zealand by Labour Party spokespeople, usually to justify an assertion with no supporting evidence.

At the same time “at this point in time” replaced “now”, a classic example of voguish speech superfluousness. In a solo effort Winston Peters kept it alive long after it was abandoned by the public.

One currently in vogue is the word “Solutions”, now applied unnecessarily to a wide range of situations. Typical are company names. Bloggs Plumbing Ltd for example is now Bloggs Plumbing Solutions.

When TVNZ ran a business program each morning in the first decade of this century it always included a 10 minute session with a different share-broker each day.

My partner and I would lie in bed and wager with one another on how many “Going Forwards” the bugger would utter. They still do, long after the rest of the world has moved on as they’re the ultimate mindless fashion followers.

We’re picky about who we let into our buildings as tenants, the sole consideration being any adverse effect on other occupants. Thus if someone started a school for budding share-brokers and wanted office premises there’s no way we’d accept them.

That’s because people don’t want to share the lifts with vacuous young men in dark pinstripe suits with brown shoes and no tie, chanting “Going Forward” to one another.

On that note, the Nats would do themselves a power of good by insisting Luxon wear a bloody tie and at least look Prime Ministerial, even if he has nothing to say.


“Plumbing Solutions” should be simplified to “sewage”.

Just like “New and improved.” It is either new or improved. It cannot be both. That really gets to me.

I think the key takeaway of this, is that in order to truly affect change, we must step up to the plate and take ownership, by implementing multiple solutions and leveraging our human capital in a synergistic and inclusive manner. Moving forward, this could be a truly sustainable game changer.

The latest in word is sustainable

These superlatives have been driven by the industry of mass marketing, to aid and abet consumerism…

Now that the majority of consumers have maxed out their mortgages and credit cards, I expect these superlative people will get their wings clipped too…

No amount of marketing is going to drum up business, if the customers cant afford your product or service…Subsidies are just a temporary lie, to keep the peace and buy votes…

Unfortunately, our government will continue to borrow to cover their mistakes and make life easy for themselves, until they cant borrow anymore…which is closer than what most people think…

How about ‘speak to the problem’ this has gained international use amongst the media and now MPs. I never knew a problem could hear, but it just goes to show how out of touch I am.

“As we speak”….makes me cringe!

“At the end of the day” is surely night.

Winston”s favourite…. ‘the facts of the matter’

“Unprecedented” does my head in.

Fit for purpose – of course it should be
Unintended consequence – some idiot stuffed up

Most reporters don’t know what “literally” means

The one I love is “learnings”…

Last October I saw the best advert for a plumbing company I’ve ever laid eyes on. It was among all the other adverts and promotional guff for Halloween we are now subject to.

The plumbing company simply said they were experts at “Trickle Treating”.

“Reach out to me”, just bloody say “contact me”.

What if i were in the business of dissolving things in liquids? Solution solutions?
I recently saw an excellent name for a panel beater up here in Qld “Hit Happens”
almost worth the accident…

One that’s also been in vogue for a while now is the interviewee’s response beginning – ‘that’s a very good/excellent/interesting/important question’! I can’t wait for an interviewer to one day start an interview by saying ‘You do not need to tell me – as a professional interviewer all my questions will be very good, excellent, interesting or important’!!!

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