The debate rages as some employees who have had a lovely indulgent time since Covid, with the ‘Working from Home’ racket, complain about being ordered back to the office.
But here’s the guts of the issue. An employer offers a position in an office. Potential employees can either take it or reject it. But they can’t decide to take it then say they want to do it differently on terms (WFH) according to their whims. It’s that elementary.
This is a dilemma currently facing Wellington commercial property identity Chris Gollins.
For reason it’s not for anyone to question, recently Chris decided to offer a job to any tattooed dwarf seeking employment, to stand in the corner of his office foyer, wearing a tutu and with a broom handle up his bum.
To my surprise, three times the job’s been filled, only for these employees to then claim they’re “working from home”, and are standing, tutu-clad and broom handle impaled in their kitchens.
Understandably Chris is in despair. Renders suggestions re dealing with this crisis are welcome.
13 Comments
They needed to relocate to a position that offered complete stability considering his office foyer is a bit “rock and roll” and rather wet on occasions
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I wonder how long before we get told WFH is a right set out in “Te Tiriti? ” ?
We deal with it by firing them. It’s that elementary.
Exactly, the employer can specify their requirements , employees are free to look elsewhere if the terms and conditions don’t suit. Good on Nicola Willis for setting some standards. The public service seems to have sunk to a new low when it comes to comparing useful output versus taxpayer $$ spent.
Simple, Bob. Tell Chris to offer them free board and lodgings in the office building. They can then “work” from home. Both parties happy.
Given their stature, they shouldn’t take up too much room…..
Got to love it Bob when you call out and mock the aflicted. Long may you continue.
Of course they should go back to work, it was good while it lasted.
You can’t tell me that their productivity is as good as if they were at work, of course they would say that it is. They are dreaming, look at all the jobs they do around home while they are supposedly working washing, ironing , vacuumming, preparing meals,looking after children out for a quick coffee with friends, just get over it and get back to work.
The good times are over,leave if you don’t like it.
No shortage of dwarf workers then?
Ha haaaaaaa!
Sir Bob, may you continue to laugh with us and at us for decades to come.
I think Chris is being a bit cute on this, and the successful dwarfs are being a bit dishonest, because there’s an obvious problem with the broom handle requirement. As we all know, all broom handles are at least 1.25 metres long and dwarfs are only 0.8 meters tall on average. So for a dwarf to insert a broom handle up his/her bum it would: 1) be very uncomfortable, and 2) poke out their mouth making conversation extremely difficult. So I think Chris is being less than serious in his broom requirement, and the successful dwarfs have displayed their dishonesty in claiming to have inserted a broom handle up bum when we know this is not feasible…
Last weekend after playing in a soccer game, I had a conversation on the sidelines with an old work colleague who is now a manager at an enormous industrial electrical contracting business in Phoenix Arizona. I asked him if he was happy in his new role and he explained that he loved it, the work was stimulating and challenging, but then he lamented that the biggest problem he faced was staff retention. They employ over 200 electricians, but with the highly competitive job market, staff jump ship and it was a constant battle of ensuring he had enough staff to meet the ongoing work commitments . Seems to me that the most valuable resource a company has, is the people that they employ, so how they are treated is pivotal to business success.
As for solving the crisis of getting a tutu clad broom holder to stand still in the corner, I suggest it would be easier to buy a robot for that job. Toshiba make some nice models and it might even vacuum the office as an added bonus. The manager would only need to remember to charge its battery every night before going home after work.
But if you want to talk about a real crisis, then read today’s news, where I see the Biden/ Harris administration announced they will send another $7.9 billion of “ military aid “ to the Ukraine, and they invited Zelensky to an arms factory in Scranton, Pennsylvania to personally sign some bombs as part of his “ plan for victory “ in his country’s war with Russia.
I see a video conferencing solution …set a screen in the lobby, cameras around Dwarfs home, Just like one of those big brother (pun intended) reality shows, might be syndication money in it, I see a win win given its unique selling point. its only ever been done once before , Inglewood, where rugby and broom handles seem to mix well.
Looks like they think and act they’re Labour Greens government employees.