A POSSIBLE BRIGHT FUTURE FOR JAMI-LEE ROSS

Having stuffed up running a brothel, if Jami-Lee Ross still has political ambitions he should migrate to Paraguay, one of my favourite countries since I first went there half a century back.

In those days it was ruled by the world’s longest post-war dictatorship of Alfredo Stroessner who ran a laissez-faire state for 35 years from 1954. Laissez-faire that is, subject to no political aspirations or comments, so he crushed the press.

Going back, in the mid-20^th century a world-class no-hoper became President and simultaneously went to war with Brazil, Argentina and Uruguay. The upshot, six years later, was scarcely a male left over the age of 12. This fact is revealed by a book in my library’s Latin American section titled “Land of Women”.

Ever since the country, rich in natural resources, has openly solicited migration and large numbers of different nationalities, although specially Koreans, have come in, provided a much needed economic energy.

More importantly and which will appeal to Jami (and certainly does for me), they’ve all interbred with the best-looking native Indian girls by a country mile, from Alaska downwards, namely the Guranis of whom there are now no pure-bloods left.

Given Jami’s dad was maori, mixing with these girls would be a spiritual home-coming, both Guaranis’ and maoris’ ancestors coming out of Taiwan nearly 11,000 years back.

More salient is a current Paraguayan political party, “National Crusade”, which picked up 23% of the vote in the April election. This is a political party made in heaven for Jami.

Its leader Paraguayo Cubas, known as Payo, split the opposition vote in the April elections, enabling a comfortable win for the Colorado Party which has held power for 75 of the last 80 years and which announced after the election, it would produce an election manifesto soon, although no change is expected to its ultra-low tax rates.

But it’s Payo’s Party which should appeal to Jami to join. To give an idea of Payo’s form, once, being prosecuted for an offence, he tore his pants belt off and gave the judge a severe beating then bowled into his office and crapped on the floor. Anyway, he now has 5 MPS, although only 4 in the Congress, one currently residing in prison.

All of this sounds tailor-made to Jami and he should make his way there pronto.